Support Group Meeting for Avocado Addicts

I’m Ashley and I’m an avocado junkie.  You know, I go to grocery stores and I feel like, if I had a conversation with another person it would be like, so superficial.  Whereas here, we can get down to the nitty gritty stuff that we deal with every day.

Other people in general, when they hear those words, “Avocado Support Group,” they go kinda crazy.    

But, in here, we’re the same.  And that’s what I love about this fellowship.  We’re all different kinds of people.  And, I can relate to all of you.  Like, there’s this common special bond that we have that I don’t have outside of this room.

So I hope you got something out of that.  Maybe you have something else to say, to contribute.  The floor is yours and there are plenty of people to share.

Hey, I’m Michael and I’m addicted to avocados.  My friend, who eats avocados, invited me to a party last weekend.  And I was like, what are people gonna think when I’m not eating chips and guac?  What are they gonna think about their old buddy? 

You know, I went to this party and everybody was eating chips and guacamole.  No salsa, no cheese dip.  I thought about it beforehand just a little bit.  I’m here.  My purpose is to promote life without avocados.  I’ve changed my life and this is where I am and I can have fun.  And, I don’t need avocados anymore. 

Like when the guacamole was being passed around the table.  I took it, passed it to the next guy, didn’t even think about it.  It’s not for me.

And they were like, “You’re not having any?”  And I was like, “No.  I don’t eat avocados,”  And they were like, “Ok.”  And, nobody cared.  And it was just totally fine.

And, I have this program to thank for that.  

Hi, I’m Beth and I’m an avocado addict.  And yesterday I actually did have a choice to eat avocados.  It was my birthday yesterday so I went to this restaurant.  And, the waiter was like, “Do you want to have some avocado hummus?”  And I’m like, “No, I’m good, I’m good.”

And he came back, like fifteen minutes later, free salad with avocado puree.  Now, free is my go-to.  But then it was with no hesitation, I was like, “No, I’m good. I don’t eat avocados.”  And I was like, I don’t know where that came from.  So I was actually happy about that.  But yesterday could have went different.  Thanks for letting me share. 

My name is George and I’m an avo maniac.  I’ve heard everything that’s been shared in the meeting.  And I just want to say, don’t take that bait.  Resist temptation. 

And it’s a good reminder sitting here that I used to live like, I’ll show you.  I’ll eat an avocado straight out of the shell.  I’ll show YOU.

Like, me and a couple of my buddies, I knew if I started eating avocados, they were kinda the same way. They started eating avocados, they weren’t gonna quit.  And I knew, if I had one slice, I was gonna eat avocados until I couldn’t function anymore.

You know, that was the temptation and I could still see the avocado trees, I could still see the avocado bin at Kroger.  I can still see that kind of stuff, all the other temptations. It’ll catch you off your guard.

Things will catch you when you’re not looking and when you’re not looking, they’ll catch you.  All right, that’s all I got. 

My name’s Sam and I’m an avocado head. When I came into the Avocado Support Group, my sponsor pointed out a couple of things to me.  He said, “Sam, you’re not a special case.”

Because, in my estimation of me, I was a special case that the program could not help.  I only had a program for me.  Keep in mind, that many times I was just your typical garden-variety avocado addict.

When I came into ASG, my sponsor told me, he said that eating avocados was just a symptom.  And that sometime I would have to get down to causes and conditions.

You see, I didn’t know that when I came in.  I thought avocados were the problem.  My defects of character, whatever they are, they’re separate. 

So, my progress has been, and what I love about ASG to this day, I started coming to meetings, as seriously addicted to avocados as I was, seeing ASGs with years of life without avocados.  They seemed happy, joyous and free.

You know, when I act on a defect, that can be the main thing that takes me down the road, that leads me back to eating avocados.  Right?

And I am a work in progress so thanks for letting me share.

My name’s Frank and I’m an avocado addict.  It’s great to be here and I appreciate your lead.  The part that I heard, the thing that I noticed, you put a lot of passion into the program.  The only way that you do that is you go through a lot of shit.  You don’t come here and not sit in your shit. 

It’s the only place you come to sit in your shit by yourself.  We go to other places like church or the hospital and they help you while you sit in your shit.  But in here you sit in your shit by yourself. 

Because what the avocado addict knows is that you can’t save them.  That’s what the avocado junkie knows.  And because the avocado abuser knows that, they just leave you alone.  And if somebody is trying to help you, they’re probably an avocado addict. 

So I’m grateful to be here and I’m going to keep coming back.  I know some of y’all don’t want me here but I’m gonna come back anyway.  

• Support Group Meeting for Avocado Addicts
• Jim H. Tells His Story
• Forced Convenience
• An Insta-worthy Attempt
• Contemplating Life Lessons in Starbucks